One of my very best friends transitioned from us 2 years ago on October 18, 2010.  He had just turned 60 two days before. His loss as sudden and unexpected.  Losing anyone is very hard.  This was not the worse loss in my life so far.

On December 22, 1999 at 16:30 my 17 year old son transitioned from us due to complications from a T-bone auto accident caused by a reckless 16 year old.  This has been my darkest Day in my 60 years of life.  As a parent you never think about having to bury a child.  This event sent me into a downward spiral spiritually and mentally.

You will notice that I use the word “transition” instead of “die”.  The reason is that I believe that we never die (Spiritually), so transition is a more accurate description of what happens when we leave our Earthly bodies. Our Souls were and will always BE throughout Eternity.

As if that was not enough my Dad on July 22, 2004 and my Mom on November 20, 2007 transitioned from us.  I have lost several other friends as well since my Son.

So how do you deal each day with what you have experienced?  How will you cope with this for the rest of your life?

Here are some of the things I have found that has helped me and you can also find the help you may need.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

First, you are going to be angry, sad, depressed and down right pissed off for quite a while. That’s OK!  If you get badly depressed don’t ignore it, seek professional help.

Second, seek out others who have had a loss and talk or meet with them.  There are groups for all most all forms of loss.  If you have lost a child then this will be a good one www.compassionatefriends.org. There are groups in all most all States and they meet regurally.  The Internet is a great source for other groups.  If you are a senior you can find information thru the AARP.

Third, one of the best people that can help you is a Stephen Minister. They will come walk along side you for as long s you need them.  Your local Church is a good source for finding a Stephen Minister.  If you don’t know of a Church near you then look at their website at www.stephenministries.org.  There are also books and resources on this site as well.

Fourth, find an outlet whether you journal or start a blog.  I have several blogs where I write and express different thoughts and ideas.  One of my on going ones is www.neverforgottencards.com  This blog is where I post pages of those I and others have lost.  The longterm goal is to set it up where people can send out cards to family members of those who have had a loss during the year at times like Birthdays, Anniversaries or to let them know you are thinking about them.  If you would like your relative or friend on the site send me a comment and I will contact you.

Finally, don’t think you can just gut it out on your own.  If you do try to gut it out then one day it will just smack you in the face for the worse.  If you can’t  find help please write me a comment and I will reach out to you.